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9 reasons to join XIHA Life

#1 XIHA Life is truly multilingual. The one and only place to keep in touch with friends and family in all the languages you speak! All text is filtered and shown only to those who can read it.

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The Story of the JACK-O-LANTERN

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Funniest jokes ever

XIHA Life Forum → Entertainment → Jokes → Funniest jokes ever

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1. Joe | 2006-09-15 | English

A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: hes allowed to say two words every seven years. After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. "Cold floors," he says. They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, "Bad food." They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him in for his two words. "I quit," he says. "Thats not surprising," the elders say. "You've done nothing but complain since you got here."

9 reasons to join XIHA Life

#2 We are fully localized to 42 languages! Your friends from other other countries can enjoy XIHA in their own language. If you don't have friends in other countries yet - join XIHA and you will!

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2. Joe | 2006-09-15 | English

A guy enters bar carrying an alligator. Says to the patrons, "Heres a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed. If it works, everyone buys me drinks." The crowd agrees. The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth. Gator closes mouth. After a minute, the guy grabs a beer bottle and bangs the gator on the top of its head. The gator opens wide, and he removes his genitals unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks. Then he says: "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try." After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar. It's a woman. "I'll give it a try," she says, "but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."

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3. Joe | 2006-09-15 | English

A guy meets a hooker in a bar. She says, "This is your lucky night. Ive got a special game for you. Ill do absolutely anything you want for $300, as long as you can say it in three words." The guy replies, "Hey, why not?" He pull his wallet out of his pocket, and one at a time lays three hundred-dollar bills on the bar, and says, slowly: "Paintmyhouse."

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4. Joe | 2006-09-15 | English

A lady at a party goes up to Winston Churchill and tells him, "Sir, you are drunk." Churchill replies, "Madam, you are ugly. In the morning, I shall be sober."

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5. Joe | 2006-09-15 | English

Another joke! ...a father is explaining ethics to his son, who is about to go into business. "Suppose a woman comes in and orders a hundred dollars worth of material. You wrap it up, and you give it to her. She pays you with a $100 bill. But as she goes out the door you realize shes given you two $100 bills. Now, heres where the ethics come in: should you or should you not tell your partner?"

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6. Lily | 2006-11-12 | English

hehehe. I wouldn't tell my partener lol. No I probably would. Darn those voices in my head!
*Lily*

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7. Jing Jing | 2007-10-4 | English

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